I’ve been feeling receptive lately, vaguely but surely open to new ideas and suggestions. These whispers from the world might come from anywhere – dark windows seen through the trees, a sentence in an otherwise mediocre novel. Fortune cookies.
First of all, I love them. I used to eat them with my dog when I was a kid, carefully prying them into halves with my thumbs and giving one piece to him. His big pink tongue would reach out and scoop it up and he’d sigh, then settle against my leg. The fortune was all mine, but I’d read it out to him and try to make it relevant to his life.
Even accounting for my pro-fortune cookie bias, I’ve been having a run on coincidences lately when it comes to their typed paper slips.
I received this one a few days ago – the first thing to come into my hand after a surprising and promising connection hands me a business card.
A chance meeting opens new doors in success and friendship.
Then, inside a cookie taken as a sugary break from a round of emails with Eddie Nuttall (the first I’ve had in years that came with a bibliography):
No problem can sustain the assault of sustained thinking.
The email thread been a conversation about play and love, and I’d been thinking that starting a new enterprise is so exciting, such a leap of faith that feels sometimes like very risky play.
I made myself dinner and let myself feel proud of a piece of work I’d just accomplished. “If this is being nearly 30,” I thought, “then I’ll take it”. A series of soul-sucking jobs before I got into play had given me a combination of low expectations and low tolerance for boredom when it came to employment, and I’d never thought of work as a place where so much could be learned about oneself. I’d not expected to to find a field so full of debates about intuition and mystery, about what constitutes a life well lived, and I’d not expected to find work that taught me new ways to navigate the world (and to consider the worlds of the past, the future, and of dreaming). Taking a last fortune cookie out of the bag left from a mammoth delivery last week, I unrolled and read the following message:
If I bring forth what is inside me, what I bring forth will save me.
And it felt true.